Here at Casa Carolan, we're undergoing massive transformation, inner and outer! After years of feeling stuck about our small home, we've finally loosened up the mental ties that bind and change is flowing FAST!
New furniture, new paint, new floors, new job schedules, new child care - just to scratch the surface.
That's all the outer "stuff," and it's reflective of serious inner shifts we've been making as individuals and as a family unit.
To me, it feels like miraculous change, but I know from my work as a life purpose coach that dreams come true when you shift your mindset before you shift your world. (Click here to tweet).
Today, I had the blissful, deeply satisfying feeling of looking out over my cottage and saying, "I am falling in love with my home". I had the experience of ease in motherhood while my kiddo played outside and I got some tasks done. I was able to relish the morning with my husband without the nagging, negative feeling of hating my home and sitting on broken chairs.
Before this year, this house was a battle. It felt like a homeowner's nightmare. Every improvement we dreamed of seemed to result in a fight about money, time, resources, priorities, you name it. We couldn't do A until we did B and then C would fall apart, negating both A and B!
Finally, we sat down for a few relationship coaching sessions (lead by me - talk about a conflict of interest!) and sorted out all kinds of beliefs, blocks, and mindsets that stood in the way of our success in creating a lovely home for ourselves and our little one.
And voila! Once the mindset was in place, the outer "stuff" got in line. We became the boss of our reality instead of vice versa. We were a team, sharing priorities, values, and a plan.
I'm fortunate to have tons of tools at my disposal when it comes to excavating, unearthing, realigning, and getting into action. But anyone can take aligned action - as long as you know what it is that you're aligning to. Life has to be consciously created; otherwise, it will build itself to reflect your inner world. (Click to tweet). It doesn't know any better. We think our realities into being, whether we know it or not.
This is my loving challenge to you, to loosen up the mental blocks between you and freedom from whatever it is that keeps you from having it all. It's work. There's no magic bullet. But you can't get from here to there without this exercise. It's critical.
Take an area of your life where you feel STUCK STUCK. I mean, tight-in-the-chest, keeps you up at night STUCK. Trapped stuck. "I will never get out of here" stuck. Career? Job? Marriage? Care for yourself? A banished hobby that used to be your lifeblood?
Look at this area carefully. Ask yourself:
1) How did you get here? What choices did you make that brought you to where you are? How did you create this reality? (You've got to own it)
2) Whose reality is it? Is this your parents' expectation? Your partner's? Your 8th grade teacher's?
3) What is the reality you truly, deeply desire in this area?
4) Assign 3 words - three, non-negotiable words - to describe the reality you desire in the area you picked. Feminine? Creative? Serene? Powerful? These words need to sing to your soul. They need to be relentlessly reflective of your own true desires.
5) If there is another person involved in this area, ask them to do the same. (This will be like light bulbs, I swear). You guys need to have at least a few similar soul-song words if this is about marriage, home, or other shared domains.
6) Post your words everywhere. Do not make a single decision around that area until the decision is aligned with the words. Big and small decisions. Don't even have a thought about the area of life you're tackling, unless you've first called those words to mind.
This is the start of the process toward clear, aligned action. It's not easy work - but once you have clarity, reality will get in line behind you to support your vision, in small and big ways.
And if it feels reeeeallly overwhelming, well, that's what a life purpose coach is for. Shoot me an email, we'll have a chat on the house about how you can get closer to your dreams. A compassionate third party can often see and hear things that you never knew were holding you back.
I believe that all of us living closer to our dreams would mean co-creating a dream world for more people. Inside and out.