===>When you make yourself crazy to save your one work-at-home day and have to lock yourself in a closet to talk to your boss on the phone and then your boss says, "Do you have a pencil and paper?"
so you contemplate actually pricking your finger and stamping the information in blood on your bridesmaid dress
rather than subject your boss to hearing the wails of your child who wants cheerios NOOOOOOWWWWW...
===>When you emerge from the closet and realize you've mixed the Kix and Cheerios in a big container to save room in the cabinet,
and she hates Kix despite all your efforts to talk her into eating "sweet little balls" (yup, that came out of my mouth),
and you're standing there picking the Kix out of the Cheerios because your kid is so picky and tiny that you just want her to eat...
===>And you let her eat the Cheerios on the couch and
she's watching her 3rd hour of TV and it's not even 10am yet but at least we're in the same room, right?
And that counts for something? And it saves us money on only 4 days of school?
===>And while you're picking the Kix out your mind is racing, "Am I spoiling my kid? Is this going to lead to having a little Veruca Salt? Is she going to want an Oompa Loompa man, Daddy? I'm sure she's fine. She's loving and sweet and says "please". She asked for her own dollhouse for her birthday. Is this going to be her first memory? why doesn't she like Kix? It's kid-tested. It says so on the box. I can't believe I'm wasting this food. I'll just eat it. I'm on a diet. What kind of example is that for her? Eating someone's leftover cereal?" (there were a lot of Kix in the Cheerios).
===>and you look at her little towhead, still in her jammies, little heini butt up in the air, head on her blankie, watching Strawberry Shortcake...you don't care if she gets ADHD from watching TV for more than the APA recommended 2 hours per day.
You're breathing the same air.
You get to be the one who gives her food and hears her witty comments, for today.
To set up a fort and see her delight in a house "just her size".
To hold her if she bumps her knee and to gaze in on her while she naps.
And I think this week, the balance tipped toward me getting to spend more hours with her than day care does.
Just in case you thought I had it all together.